I just graduated with my master’s degree and have completed a 1200 hr internship. Now I have to decide whether I should live rent free with parents or Move in a place of my own.
The barista put milk in my espresso machiato, making it very heavy and nearly undrinkable. I manned up and drank it.
We have too many water parks around that it’s become a real PITA to pick on up..
I’m in my bed, but the charging cable is too short for me to comfortably use my phone in my bed whilst it’s charging. WHY IS MY LIFE SO HARD 
I have a great job. That I don’t want to go to. For no reason.
I just wanna stay at home and be a dog-mom, but I can’t do that and still make lots of money.
I was planning on what to have for lunch today. So I checked out the weather forecast and it said it’d stop raining half an hour before lunch break. Therefore I decided to go out instead of placing my order for Thai together with half the office. Unfortunately the forecast was moot, it poured like a monsoon and I’m angry with how these meteorologists messed it up for me.
I went to Starbucks to order my usual grande decaf soy latte with caramel drizzle , but they messed up my order and gave me a TALL.
last night i went to bed and i started to fuck my wifes brains out then her shitty son pasquale busa calls to ask for apple then she jumped of my dick with out swallowing
Have post graduate degree and trying to be independent, professional but men who make waaaaay more money than me (and don’t have student loans) want to take care of me.
Asked for strawberry chantilli in my Açai and received chocolate instead. #FWP
On a recent European vacation the hairdryer in our hotel room was so powerful that it melted the nylon bristles on my brush.
don’t throw that piece of glass out on the road
Don’t throw that piece of glass out into the road. It might pop somebody’s tire.
I cried myself to sleep last night because I had to decline a 6-figure job offer because it wasn’t helpful to my career. Now I have to treat myself to a day spa to get over the pain.
My Apple Watch didn’t register the correct distance on my 10k around Regents Park. #FWP
I can’t get out of the restroom without getting germs again
I want my hands to be clean before my restaurant meal. So I have to cleanse them in the restroom. But I can’t get out without opening the restroom door, which transfers germs to my hand again #FWP
I have to pay $400 for a beach parking pass in Westport, CT when Weston, CT gets one for $150. My town of Wilton, CT is not WASPY enough to qualify for the discount.
The air conditioning in my Audi does not work as well as my wife’s BMW. #FWP
I’m being taxed too much due to my high salary; I need to work less, to try to get into a lower tax bracket.
The school was supposed to go to Six Flags tomorrow and I was staying home so that I didn’t have to do school work. The trip is cancelled.
Lost control while looking for the other contrl
Lost the control for the television while looking for the control for the Blu-ray box.
Internet is not being installed for 2 more days
I just moved. The internet is not being installed for 2 more days and I don’t know which box my mobile hot spot is in.
Taxi ride too short for symphony
After flying back from France I took a taxi home from the airport. About half-way home I put on the longest of the four versions that I have of Mozart’s 41st Symphony on my iPod, and listened to it through my high-quality noise cancelling headphones. The taxi arrived at my house about 3 minutes before the end of the final movement such that the final climactic finish never came. I could have continued indoors, but it would not have been the same. #firstworldproblems
My Tag Heuer is off for maintenance. I went to the beach this weekend, and got sand in the bezel of my Omega. Now it has to be sent out to get the sand out of it.
My husband and I just dont know wether we should buy a bigger car with a new caravan or a mobile home. We had several of both in the past, but now we are just so… don’t know. Life is hard!
My temperature-controlled wine room is full, and I worry that some of the wine will go bad before I can drink it.
The biggest decision of my day is deciding which Instagram filter to use on a selfie!
My polo club is lowering the requirement for this years teams to 16 goals from the usual 20. Is there a money shortage??
The Dyson Hand Dryers in the toilet at work are broken #slightlymoisthands
New jacuzzi lights are too dark so I can’t see the time on my Rolex. #FWP
I got a new refrigerator with a fancy big ice dispenser. It is bigger than any of my cup tops. This makes all of my ice fall to the floor and I have to kick it under the refrigerator because I can’t pick up slippery ice cubes. In addition the water comes out a different area and sprays you. It makes it look like you pissed yourself.
#hidingicecubesandlookinglikeIwaspissedon
For my birthday my mom bought me a $70 cake from her favorite bakery as my only present from her, quite inconsiderate of her considering I’m vegan.
My son cried and refused his milkshake because it has a lid on it #firstworldproblems
It’s Monday and my parent’s old 40 inch TV isn’t getting installed in my bedroom until Tuesday.
I can afford more expensive audio equipment than I have now; but my hearing isn’t good enough to tell the difference between the expensive stuff and what I already have.
The electronic gearshifting on my carbon fiber race bike needs recharging so I have to use my aluminum race bike. #FWP
I’m an internationally famous, multi-millionaire, Hollywood-princess, actress but the Cannes film festival makes me wear high heels on the red carpet. #FWP
